21st century Catfish

I think we all know a classic Catfish, granted they don’t take it to the extreme and Nev won’t need to investigate but a Catfish nevertheless. The best and worst part of social media is how easy it is to look ‘put together’. I love social media and following a mix of people lives but I understand that what I am seeing isn’t 100% true.

We all know the programme, we all love the programme. The idea of Catfishing someone is amusing. We laugh as the poor people honestly believe that they are dating Katy Perry. I am always flabbergasted in how far into a relationship people are and where they think it will go. Watching it you go ‘how? clearly that’s not them’. In an awful way, half the time I’m thinking mate they are way out your league there is no way which is a shocking thing to think.. because personality should be above EVERYTHING else blah blah blah

Scrolling through Instagram, my feed is filled of people I know and complete strangers. Sometimes I forget that these pictures I look at are actual people. Now don’t get me wrong, you are not going to put up a minging photo of your self online. Unless your mate has taken a shocker then be sure you’ll get a tag. For the majority of people I know, I see your pictures and think ‘yeah fair do’s your face looks like that’. The minority, I’m thinking ‘who dis? Seriously, you don’t look like that.’ 

Back in the day, you would Catfish someone with a different picture. yeah honestly i look like Beyoncé. Now its all about the pose, the filter and the caption. Out of those three, the caption is the most important to me. There is nothing better than a witty pun, people think I just think of them straight away. Heres the truth, I spend HOURS, actually hours thinking about a pun or a funny comment for people to scroll past it without realising it. what’s the point, please start praising me. IMG_3512

In one of my last posts, I ranted about some trends which I think are stupid! One trend that I just don’t really get is makeup. Makeup on steroids. Walking down the street, I look at girls and think how long has it taken you to do that. It will be 9.00am and there are girls that look like they are going out… y’no out out. I have about 10 minutes to get ready because the 5 alarms I set didn’t wake me from my dreams. Not going to lie, I wake up looking like a dragon, literally no amount of makeup will hide that. ‘Instagram’ makeup, which was once a night out look, has become an everyday look for so many girls. The caked-on foundation, the brown contour and the highlight that is not sparkly but grey. Eyeshadow, fake lashes and mahoosive eyebrows.  I often wonder what I would look like if I went for the ‘insta look’. Would I look like Kim Kardashian or Kim Carcrashian???? Obviously, people are free to do what ever they want with their bodies, you do you sweetie. But come on, we are all individuals in this world, so why is everyone wearing the exact same makeup look. Girls, you don’t need to cover you skin with so much foundation, we all know what skin should look like. Honestly ladies, I can hear your skin singing both Chris’ and Jordins parts of No Air.

Snap filters used to be a fun thing to send to your pals, wheyyy look at me I swapped my face with my brother, now people actually put a snapfilter selfie on social media. WHY?! Someone please explain to me why?! Clearly you don’t have butterflies flying around your head 24/7. Nor are you a dog. I don’t find it cute or funny, I find it strange. What is wrong with a good old Instagram filter. Oh and that ‘beauty’ filter isn’t beautiful, it gives me the strangest colouring.. come on snapchat I don’t actually want to look like a marshmallow. Pairing the makeup and the snap filters always leaves me questioning who is Jack and who is Jill? Also, do you ever think how many Tinder dates are currently sat next to each other without realising…*20 minutes later*…”God you look different.. where are your butterflies?”

The catfish phenomenon needs to be stopped. Maybe one day people will stop hiding behind a filter and become part of the real world… and stop whacking all that highlight on. It’s not brighter than your future, its greyer than tarmac.

El

TPS X

PS the answer to your question, defiantly Kim CarcrashianIMG_3521