21st century dating

Dating is tough and its boring. Gone are the days of meeting your other half at your local village dance. that is how everyones grandparents met right?! The ‘well back in our day..’ tips are a little tired. No you can’t just talk to a stranger in the street, it doesn’t work that way. Can we just skip this part and go straight to the marriage, living nice house with an aga and an orangery and maybe a couple of cool mini me’s that I can dress up???

I’m pretty sure trying to avoid creepy boys (and old men) in clubs is like trying to get through the last round of Raven. Have you ever seen anyone survive that round? Have you ever seen someone successfully avoid a creepy guy? Maddeys suggests my single pals and I go to bars to pick up the boyz but then we end up drinking 3 bottles of wine and deciding our next business venture which don’t need no man. *finger snap* #INDEPENTANTWOMEN

and the ‘ you’ll meet someone at work’ also is bull. What happens if you work in a cyclists cafe where the average age for the men strutting through the door is 70. I mean I could be a sugar baby but I’ve seen these guys in tight lycra. very tight lycra. I really don’t want to see anymore. Just take your coffee and go.

Guess the only option is tinder. but the selection is poor. I’ve already gone through the people around me, if I up my age range, i’ll end up with their dads. Just remember to turn off notifications when in public.. everyone knows the tinder sound… and everyone will look.

Also don’t believe the girls in films. I’ve tried the bend and snap but I don’t do yoga and you can tell. Stalking boys like Geogria and Jazz is creepy and police will get involved and And I haven’t met a boy that is repulsed by my smell… that one I’m happy about.

BUT STILL

I don’t think what I wanting is too much of a ask:

6.5ft+, 22-28, can be into rugby but not needed, medic/vet/dentistry (baller), funny personality, can come up with witty Instagram captions, happy to watch me shop in Zara.

So if anyone is selling any cats, get in touch.

EL X

TPS

PS. I’m not desperate.

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